As a mother I am constantly trying to protect my kids. I'm sure I'm not alone. However, there are some things you can't prevent, some things you can't control.
Thomas' best friend moved to California.
I knew it was going to happen. I actually knew 9 months before it was going to happen. At first I didn't wan't to mention it to him. I know how much he is like me and how easy it is for him to worry about things TOO much.
I'll never forget the day that Thomas found out Ryan was moving. We had been playing at the park with him. They were having a great time, but it was time to wrap things up and go home to get dinner started. As we were walking away, Ryan made some mention of having to move to California. As soon as the words left Ryan's mouth, I saw it in disbelief and sadness in Thomas' eyes. As we were walking home he started to cry. I wanted to take away his pain, but I knew I couldn't. I could only comfort him.
I tried to get him excited about Skype and phone calls and how he would be able to email him whenever he wanted. It kind of worked.
Eventually moving day rolled around. We were getting ready to leave for the day and I knew that I had a decision I had to make. Do I drive off and not take him to say goodbye? In other words, do I close my eyes and hope he forgets that it is happening? Or do I drive him by the house and give him that final chance to say goodbye? As badly as I wanted to drive off and hope he forgot it was moving day, I knew I couldn't. I have a problem with avoidance I don't want to teach him how to avoid things. Instead of turning right to leave the neighborhood I turned left and found myself driving around to block to Ryan's house. When we pulled up his dad was locking up the truck. I rolled down my window and asked if Ryan could come outside. Thomas didn't want to get out of the car. He was sitting in the back seat and said he was fine to wave goodbye (he is SOO like me). I had him get out of the car to give Ryan a hug goodbye while I gave my good friend Janae a hug goodbye.
We both got back in the car and were quiet. I drove out of the neighborhood with mixed emotions. I was so sad that he was upset, but I was glad that I made him say goodbye.
3 comments:
OMG, AMY! I knew there was a reason I liked you so much. We are long lost twins. I am the EXACT same way. Avoidance is my middle name. I close my eyes and pretend things aren't really happening also.
We moved from CA to VA. I told my friends I was coming back a week later to be at our house when the movers put our stuff in the truck. I needed to be there to sign the paperwork, but in the back of my mind I knew I'd find someone else to do it for me. I just didn't want to REALLY have to say good bye to my friends.
You are sooooo awesome to have done that for Thomas. You are teaching him a valuable lesson. I am so proud of you. I KNOW that was hard.
Reading this post made me want to cry! Probably because I've had a couple of close friends move away recently. Saying goodbye kind of kills me, so I just always say "see you later" and tell myself we'll find a way to visit again soon.
Poor Thomas. You definitely did the right thing!
I missed this post, sorry. But the pictures are so sweet and it will be nice to have the memories and the goodbye with him.
And Clara and her ruffle butt [below] made me giggle. The girl is adorable coming and going. heehee
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